Monday, July 29, 2013

Too: To a Higher Degree than is Desirable, Permissible, or Possible

He was too young. It happened too soon. It’s all too sad. This is just too close for comfort. He meant too much to too many. Too many are hurting.  

Over the weekend, a friend very suddenly and completely unexpectedly, passed away. He was only 46. We weren’t close friends, but I had known him for a little more than 10 years. He was, however, very close friends to a good friend of ours. And that relationship, amplified the magnitude of this earthquake by a 100 times. Maybe even a thousand. I really can’t do math right now.

I’m not sure why I’m even writing about it, or what I’m trying to say. It’s not as if I can make sense out of this. It makes no sense. He was in great shape. I heard some of the details, rather, I was told some of the details. But, similar to a scene from the movie Spanglish, there was a crack in the world. I vividly remember being told what happened, but none of the details stuck. My brain couldn’t manage hearing while trying to comprehend what had happened.

Now, my heart breaks for his wife. My heart breaks for his son and daughter. My heart breaks for his twin brother. There was so much to admire and respect. He had a close knit group of friends, dating back to high school and college. I saw the kind of relationship every brother hopes to have. They lived within five miles of each other, and spent summer vacations together in Destin, Florida.

Toughest of all, was seeing the relationship he had with his children. When I was in my teens to early 20’s, I couldn’t imagine being so close with my father. Now that I am a parent, I can only hope to immolate what he had. How many 20 year old daughters would post so many photos with their father on Facebook? It sounds like such an insignificant fact, but I was always really impressed. He wasn’t someone I’d text, I’d just see him around from time to time. And while his poker playing style could drive me nuts, I always hoped to learn more about his parenting style.

Life is too short, and too precious. A late night movie with friends is too easily taken for granted. Too many words go unsaid. It’s all just too sad. 

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