Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Swingers 2k11

I simply love the movie, Swingers. Yeah, I really had to say movie there, because just saying “I love Swingers” would be a completely different and false statement, which would get me in loads of trouble at home. That said, I was recently thinking about how different that movie would be if it took place in 2011. A lot has changed since 1996.

Here are a few things that I think would be different:
Mikey wouldn’t just vent to Rob about his ex, he’d blog about the pain.

When the Mike and Trent are closing in on Vegas, rather right after uttering, “Vegas baby, Vegas” Trent would Tweet, “Vegas, Baby, Vegas. #Vegas!”

The guys wouldn’t play blackjack in Vegas, opting for poker instead. “Always raise with aces. Always, baby.”

Each time the guys hit a new bar or party, they’d get out their iPhones and check in on Foursquare.
Mikey would check his ex-girlfriend’s Facebook page for updates, and find out about the lawn jockey from a profile update.

Mikey wouldn’t have left five drawn out messages on that girl Nikki’s answering machine; he would have sent her 15 text messages.

Mike wouldn’t pine over his ex, by looking at a shoebox full of old photos, instead looking at an old Myspace page.

Instead of meeting up at Sue’s pad to play Sega before heading out, they’d play “Call of Duty” online from the comfort of their own homes.

Instead of auditioning for sitcoms, the guys would be trying out for reality television shows. Rob’s big news wouldn’t be a Pluto call back, but a Real World call back.

After leaving the diner, Trent would tweet where they were and, “I would never eat there. #Imthebadguy”

There would be no going home to check messages, since no one would have a home phone, just cell phones. Mikey would constantly be checking his phone for missed calls and reporting how many bar’s he has.

Instead of arguing how long Mikey should wait to call a girl, the debate would center on the proper waiting time before sending a friend request on Facebook.

When Mike meets Lorraine, and she asks for his number, she’d also ask for his email address and someone would say “I’ll Facebook you.” His card would also have his URL, which would contain an image of the duck head from “You Bet Your Life.”

Thankfully, Swingers came out at the perfect time. So money, baby.

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